- 22 Going On 23
Woman: I enjoy your show and I've been trying to get through for quite a while.
Man: Well, We're glad you kept trying
Woman: Umm. I have this problem. Last July, I was assaulted...sexually,
and ever since then, I've been having trouble sleeping.
Man: How old are you?
Woman: I'm 22 going on 23
Man: Medicine...Counseling...Anxiety...Sleep Programming
..Medicine...Sleep Programming
- Ah Ha
Here on Monday seems like Friday
Happened just the other day
Tuesday faked for Friday morning
Then it started up again
What would I do Monday's through
Nothing seems to change
I Guess I'll have to wait for Friday
Turn into another day
- Birds
Alright what are we doing here? Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.
aaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
You're workin and you already stinks like a finger,
Roller Coaster lovely hair
You wanna pop a bubble out you know it's only trouble
cause you think that no one better can care
Wham bam it's a scam you're the man we're your friends
We go nothin' better to say
- Boiled Dove
Imagine..your father was naked and you had just fallen through the ceiling into a room full of soft-moist eyeballs.
I can tell you, but my mind keeps fading away.
And you keep trying, but you don't got nothin' to say.
So we tried stealing, but somebody took it away.
Yo! You were in your family car, following a checkered cab that could somehow fly. And as you were watching the flying cab it faltered and crashed into the parking lot of a nearby shopping mall. Everybody in the cab was dead, except for a college buddy who came stumbling out of the wreckage.
- Cough Syrup
She played for The Angels,
I played for The Tribe
The summer had been stolen
And the bases were all loaded
There was big money on the line
Big money all the time, yeah
There was big money on the line
- Dracula From Houston
Got no future
Great big past
Little bitty guy on the rim of my glass
Gotta meet the plane so I can get my monkey
Teach him to be cool
But a little bit funky
Got no credit
And I got no fear
- Gary Floyd
I could have a real good time if I had a gun
I know, well I know The things I do and say
And if I did not have no gun well I know, I know
I've got a knife
Well, Gary Floyd and all his pals are gonna' come on down
To the roundaround They're gonna' shoot all day
Saw nature by the swimming pool
In a two-piece and I lost my cool
- Hey
Oh, I don't know,
and you can't say.
And even if you could,
it ????? be anyway
Let's go to hell
Hey...Hey.....
Now I'm in love,
not with he or she
- Human Cannonball
Pardon me
I'm only bleeding
But you cut me
To the bone
My imperfections
Have reduced you
To a lowly
Animal
- I Saw an X-Ray of a Girl Passing Gas
Ten foot tall and the nurse stuck a needle in my arm.
Well uncle Doc's nurse used a needle with ungodly charm.
Walkin' down the hall,the dentist Loomed through the door.
I Saw an X-Ray of a girl passing gas.
The one shot theory got a query things got rolling at last.
Hey...hey...hey...daddy why'd ya die in the war?
Jesus,Hitler,Buddha,Santa,Mary,Klaus partied thrice more.
- Jingle Of A Dogs Collar
I was looking for the main line
And I was, working through a friend of mine
But I, couldn`t seem to find the time,
What do they know about love?
What do they know about love?
What do they know about love, my friend?
What do they know about love?
The jingle of a dogs collar
- just do it
All night long my body burned
The sheets were wet and cold
The lights were on, my eyes were gone
And any second lose control
The pounding in my window
Or just the pounding in my head
I wonder who was in my room that night
- Let's Talk About Cars
[A man and woman speaking in French]
Goodbye benediction
Goodbye gasoline
Goodbye paranoia
Goodbye sleeze
[Again speaking in French]
- My Brother's Wife
I am not a priss, my brothers wife
There was a time when i thought that the longer
am I a slave to my mind oh. ahhhhhh
My brothers wife.
I know it's not right what Im thinking deniy me.
My brothers wife
I will always stay. My brother wife
I know. shh.
- Pepper
Marky got with Sharon
And Sharon got Cherese
She was sharing Sharon's outlook
On the topic of disease
Mikey had a facial scar
And Bobby was a racist
They were all in love with dyin'
They were doing it in Texas
- Star
I`m in love with a TV star
She drove me home in her Lexus car
Like a dog but I dont watch her show
Spend my time with the Radio
Seen her dancing on the Sunset Strip
Bellbottomed Jeans, and a-curvy hips
Seen her sitting there with her boyfriend
Good looking fella but hes looking kinda thin
- The Last Astronaut
Now we have-
We've, uh, cleared
the Southern tip of
South America and
We're coming in-
on into Australia
and over New Zealand
and I have never seen-
- The Lord Is a Monkey
Ahhhh...
The Lord is a monkey
Thanksgiving's coming on the Fourth of July
In the form of a girl with a needle in her eye
Well she come from out west on a nickel worth of gas
Got her mind on her money and a dope up her ass
Outside of Phenix she was kinda broke down
Burned a cracker-boy rig and she was out of that town.
- The Shame Of Life
I love the girls and the money and the shame of life
My shallow mind is just a sign of your game of life
There were girls in the front
There were girls in the back
And there were girls pettin' squirrels
And there were squirrels smokin' crack
With an old Navy Seal and the DEA
And a loaded automatic just to blow me all away
- The Wooden Song
Take me, break me
Tell me a good one and maybe I'll cry
Go with me, show me
Tell me a good one and maybe I'll die
Lately I've been dancing in ceiling fans
Into the kitchen and out the back gate
Well I know it sounds strange but it could be the other way
Round to the ground where I know I must stay
- Tiny Rubberband
They had time and so did I, time and time again
Shook our clothes into the river, never lost a friend
Several times they came in T-shirts, helped me move the sand
In my room I keep, my love, a tiny rubberband
They got fifteen stitches and a visit from the man
If I'd been told I'd not have sold that tiny rubberband
- TV Star
I'm in love with a TV star
She drove me home in her Lexus car
Like her dog but I don't watch her show
Spend my time with the radio
Seen her dancin on the Sunset Strip
Bell-bottom jeans and her curvy hips
Seen her sittin there with her boyfriend
Good lookin' fellow but he's lookin' kinda thin
- Ulcer Breakout
Ever fall in love with a line?
Ever fall in love with a line?
Ever felt a gun for the trigger?
Ever go so fast, you could die?
Got to be at least 500 inches!
Cubic inches, on a certified quarter mile run!
- Whirling hall of knives
They she walked as she fall through the door, walk away
Ah looking as if she had seen him before, walk away
and she cried, just like me
Looking at pages and remembering lies, walk away
Apart from the graves and the place they made knives, walk away
and they cried, just like me