The Arrogant Worms все тексты (слова) песен, переводы, видео, клипы

©1994 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Russell’s Shorts.

I never much believed in reincarnation
Thought it was only people's imagination
But now I'm forced into some reconsideration
'Cause something's happened to my cat
That deserves some explanation

Baby I wanna tell you all my hopes, and dreams, and fears.
But I'm watching television, could you get me another beer?
There's wrestling and pro football on, I hope you understand
I must watch it all for I am a man.

And a man has needs,
And a man has desires,
Eternal fires that burn, burn, burn.

©1994 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Russell’s Shorts.

Umm, so this is a song about Newfoundland, and we wrote it about the place names, and all you have to know is that all the place names in this song are real place names that we found in an atlas, 'cause we can read!
Yeah, we can read!
Yeah, literacy!

Oh Newfoundland, oh Newfoundland, ya island in the sea

©1994 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Russell’s Shorts.

Umm, so this is a song about Newfoundland, and we wrote it about the place names, and all you have to know is that all the place names in this song are real place names that we found in an atlas, 'cause we can read!
Yeah, we can read!
Yeah, literacy!

Oh Newfoundland, oh Newfoundland, ya island in the sea

©2008 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Torpid.

The squirrels gathered nuts, the sun shone on the leaves
The fragrance of the flowers sweetened the gentled breeze
The birdies were all singing, but they're not anymore
'Cause I dug the whole thing up and built a big box store

©2004 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Toast!.

There are many wonders in the USA
The cities and the people, and Disney World, hooray!
But coming back to Canada with joy the heart does ooze
'Cause when you get to the border, you buy a bottle of booze

Listen up brothers and sisters, come hear my desperate tale
I speak of our friends of nature, trapped in the dirt like a jail
Vegetables live in oppresion, served on our tables each night
The killing of veggies is madness, I say we take up the fight
Salads are only for murderers, cole slaw's a fascist regime
Don't think that they don't have feelings, just 'cause a radish can't
scream
CHORUS

©2008 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Torpid.

I was having dinner with a friend
I was telling a story and nearing the end
When his cellphone rang and he said, "I gotta take this call"
So I waited for a minute or two
And then I did what I had to do

©1995 The Arrogant Worms
Appears on C'est Cheese and Semi-Conducted.

Darling for you, I think of what I'd do
To keep you safe and sound
I would climb the highest mountain, I would swim the widest sea
I would wrestle a gorilla to the ground
I would fend off a dozen charging rhinos

©1999 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Dirt!.

Through the ages, through war, pestilence and sleet, the
Celtic culture has survived, it's songs and dances passed
from father to son, from mother to daughter, from uncle to
goat. And though few still speak Gaelic, the ancient language
of the Celts, all hearts are still stirred by the beautiful tones

As a small baby
Each time I cried,
My mother came to me
To ease my worries and calm my fears
with a sweet melody.

I remember hearing the sound of her voice
As I screamed in my drool and my pee.

©1999 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Dirt!.

It's great to be a nerd. It's great to be a nerd.
The only light we ever see is from our moniter.

We argue about comic books and internet connections;
The biggest highlight of the year is the Star Trek Convention.

Once a year we celebrate
With stupid hats and plastic plates
The fact that you were able to make
Another trip around the sun

And the whole clan gathers round
And gifts and laughter do abound
And we let out a joyful sound

©2004 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Toast!.

When I'm dead put my head in the freezer
Right beside the corn and the peas
I may be dead but I am not deceased dear
One day science will reanimate me

Scott became famous for freezing to death in Antarctica
Columbus made history thinking some island was India
General Custer's a national hero for
not knowing when to run
All of these men are famous
And they're also very dumb
History is made by stupid people
Clever people wouldn't even try

©2004 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Toast!.

Everybody loves hot dogs, even pasty hippies
Find it hard to beat a tube of meat, but now a question hits me
What the hell's in a hotdog? I shouldn't ask maybe
'Cause I don't know any animals that grow cylindrically

©1999 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Dirt!, Gift Wrapped, and Semi-Conducted.

I am cow; hear me moo.
I weigh twice as much as you,
And I look good on the barbecue.
Yogurt, curd, cream cheese, and butter's
Made from liquid from my udders.

©2008 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Torpid.

I used to have money, a house, and a car
A kid and a wife and a cat
But they all left me when I lost my job
And that was the end of that
Still I wake up smiling every day

All towns have a place
Where decent drivers are not safe
Where traffic law is touch and go
Where the posted limit does not bind
And half the drivers seem to blind
And the other half is stupid, whoa, whoa, whoa

Well Billy-Bob and Bobby-Sue

©1992 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on The Arrogant Worms, Live Bait, Gift Wrapped, and Semi-Conducted.
This version is from The Arrogant Worms. See the version from Live Bait here.

If you haven't heard of me, I wouldn't be surprised
I bet you know my relatives; their names will never die
My mother is a saint, and my brother is a God
But all I am is Jesus' brother Bob

©1999 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Dirt!.

Johnny was a tall man, but his memory was short.
He'd forget to duck at doorways, and often he'd get hurt.
I took good care of him for he had no family.
Actually he did, but he forgot who they be.

©1995 The Arrogant Worms
Appears on C'est Cheese

I once was a happy man of sound and stable mind
Then my neighbor bought a dog
He put a ribbon on its head to make it cute
But it still looked like a Chihuahua
He had me over to watch it sit and beg

I met you in biology in high school
You told me after college we'd be wed
You were my favorite lab partner
Till you ran off with that brilliant young pre-med

My pain would show up on a cat-scan
My optic nerves are only seeing blue
My blood hates to flow

Oh Lord above sent His only son
To spread the word of God to everyone.
Jesus cured the lepers and He healed the lame,
But He left the bald men with their pain.

Oh mighty Lord I've lost what I had,
I've suffered the fate of my own Dad.
I looked in the hills, the valleys, everywhere,

©1997 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Live Bait and Gift Wrapped.

Billy solves his problems by calling up his mom.
Heather solves her problems with drugs and alcohol.
Daniel solves his problems with a doctor and the law,
But Malcolm's got his own way, and it's better than them all.

My country's bigger than most
And if asked i boast
'cause i'm really proud
So i shout it loud
Though our numbers are few
We will welcome you

Although we don't have history

©1999 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Dirt!.

Let me tell you a story about Scary Ned,
Scariest guy to ever wet a bed.
He had hands on his arms and eyes on his head,
But they weren't his.

©2004 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Toast!.

I have been since seventeen a shipwreck balladeer
Tragedy and misery are what makes my career
Watery graves are my stock and trade, but it's getting harder
For all the boats that now do float are returning safely to the harbor

©1999 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Dirt!.

There once was a time when the country was wild; a time before cars and planes and minivans. So to move things from one place to the other, the railroad was built. But it just didn't up and build itself. Nope! It was built by the railroad men. And among these men was a man among men among men among men among men among men; a man as tall as the sky and as wide as the land. A man who could lay track faster than anyone else could run. A man with the strength of ten men. His name was John Henry, and I'm not gonna sing about him. No, I'm gonna sing about a lesser know figure, one who doesn't deserve a song. A man as lazy as a thousand men. A man who could barely raise his own body off the ground. A man who was barely a man at all. His name was Mike McCormick.

Mike McCormick was a steel drivin' man
Who never really gave a damn.
Only thing he worked on was his tan;

There was an old farmer who lived on a rock.
He sat in the meadow just shaking his... (cock)

Fist at some boys who were down by the crick.
Their feet in the water their hands on their... (dick)

Marbles and playthings and at half past four.
There came a young lady she looked like a... (whore)

©2006 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Beige.

Edna and Ida living in a home
Both in their eighties, both widows
Their kids only call to say
They'll come by some other day

©2004 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Toast!.

Young Derrick would love to take my order (Hi!)
He works at the coffee shop just up the street (Morning!)
He's happy and annoying with a smirk the size of Texas
He's my coffee enemy

When I walk in the room
People they do bow
For I am the guy with computer know-how

I know what to do when you are staring at a screen (staring at a screen)
That says fatal error 642 you don't know what it means
(don't know what it means)
You bang the keyboard, throw the mouse, and scream like a banshee

©2006 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Beige.

When I walk in the room, people they do bow
For I am the guy with computer know-how
(computer know-how, computer know-how)

I know what to do when you are staring at a screen (staring at a screen)

I used to be a farmer, and I made a living fine,
I had a little stretch of land along the city line
But time went by and though I tried, the money wasn't there
And bankers came and took my land and told me "fair is fair"

I looked for every kind of job, the answer always no
"Hire you now?" they'd always laugh, "we just let twenty go!"
The government, the promised me a measly little sum

©2008 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Torpid.

Hey everybody look at me
No, seriously, look at me
A perfect combo of brains and beauty
I'm gonna need you people to notice me
[To Mike and Trevor] Thanks, I can do this

©2004 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Toast!.

If you believe in Darwin's theory
I'm not saying you have to but it's an interesting theory
Darwin said we all evolve from monkeys
If his theory is accurate and really who am I to say?
Does the opposite work going the other way?

©2006 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Beige.

I woke up the first morning, and I felt very bad
I wondered if it might have been something that I'd had
So I went to my doctor, a very learned man
Knowing that he'd have the problem well in hand

I used to be a farmer, and I made a living fine,
I had a little stretch of land along the CP line
But times were hard and though I tried, the money wasn't there
And the bankers came and took my land and told me "fair is fair"

I looked for every kind of job, the answer always no
"Hire you now?" they'd always laugh, "we just let twenty go!"
The government, the promised me a measly little sum

©2001 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Idiot Road.

Oh my darling, I sure loved that meal
Though I could still taste the pig squeal
Now I'm weak and losing focus
I think you gave me trichinosis

©2004 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Toast!.

Oh his trip to Greece (Moussaka!)
Oh his trip to Greece, hey
Oh his trip to Greece (Francina!)
Oh his trip to Greece, hey
Oh his trip to Greece (Alberno!)

©2008 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Torpid.

Every family's got this guy
They can't shake him no matter how they try
There's nothing anyone can do
Everybody's got an Uncle Lou

©1994 The Arrogant Worms
This song appears on Russell’s Shorts.

I never much believed in reincarnation
Thought it was only people's imagination
But now I'm forced into some reconsideration
'Cause something's happened to my cat
That deserves some explanation

I bought a ticket to Austrailia, for my holidays,
Got my boarding pass, found out at last,
That I was seated in the middle of the row.
The buisness man beside me smelled like Old Spice, and Gin.
The lady to my left was talkin bout her grandchildren.
Two kids behind me were screamin for their mum.
She was screamin back,
"Wonder how come?"